How did you wake up the day after Resurrection Sunday? So much joy spent in furious singing and chanting, "Up From the Grave He Arose!" and "Where O Death is your sting? Where, O Death, is your victory?" . . . And a breakfast buffet at church, all sugar and cream, then dinner and a company of Beautiful Others at the table, and too much ham, too much salt and too many desserts . . . and a late late night. Yes, Jesus is alive, Praise God! but Monday morning I'm hung over. Exhausted. And sad. There are sorrows that cannot be named still . .. and His tomb is empty but mine----my tomb? Maybe yours? Still sealed. With a body in it. Not risen.
Doesn't this happen every year, this whiplash between the grief of Good Friday and the giddy gladness of Easter----and then one more neck-breaking twist we never talk about: the morning after? The hangover after all the hullabaloo? When your fridge is full of leftovers (yes, Praise for this too!), but real hobbled life has returned--with extra force for its temporary absence?
I found an answer to this today, on Earth Day,as simple as a walk. Come with me for a moment? I promise not to prettify or falsify . …
I walk heavy-hearted into the ugliness of what winter has left behind---a grey day, so many days of rain, my muddy pot-holed road,
I cross the freshet which looks more like the sewage-et this time of year (it's not) . . .
Past places of danger . ..
isolation . . .
and onto death---the lake where a much-loved boy drowned last summer . …
But among and around all of this-----is something else: the rainforest. This is rainforest country, here, this eastern side of Kodiak Island.
It's always green in here---and not an ordinary green. The green of Life itself. It comes from too much rain, and not enough sun. Even in the winter, when blizzards sweep it white, underneath, the green remains. Even the trees that snap off in hurricane winds sustain luscious green life.
Nothing that lives or dies escapes the entwining moss . .. which covers all.
Martin Luther wrote, “Our Lord has written the promise of the resurrection, not in books alone, but in every leaf in springtime.”
It is not springtime yet here, but a rainforest is always alive.
Forgive this most simple allegory, and this simple hungry heart--- but I found him here today. In this rainforest. Christ. He has so encompassed us, so draped and hung himself upon us, beneath us, over us, around us, that we who are dead are brought to life again, and we who are living are yet more alive.
One more resurrection. I needed it this day. Watch for it. Every day will bring a reason to die, and the reason you do not: because He lives, still. In you, on you, around you, under you. Today I see how He is hung upon me like a scarf, like moss, like the green growing force that He is, He who will never stop clinging to me and to you. He who makes even the hollow places, the graves we carry within us, once again,
alive.
And tomorrow, we will know His resurrection life again, another way. This time----how? Will you tell me what you find??
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ReplyDeleteYesterday I discovered a few swollen, pink apricot buds, the first flower of any kind after our long, mini-death of a winter. Hope!
ReplyDeleteYour words ("He lives, still. In you, on you, around you, under you.") remind me of Paul quoting the Greek philosopher in Acts and applying those words to Christ:
"For in him we live and move and have our being."
Jesus is even more than the giver of life, he is Life itself.
He is indeed! Our very being is His. I hope your day is full of Real Life, Constance!
DeleteThe leaves are popping on the lilacs and the birds are in frenzy of song! Thanks for this Leslie!
ReplyDeleteOhhhh lilacs!! I miss lilacs from New hampshire, my favorite flower! May spring explode around you this week, Diane!
DeleteYes... After the 40 day focus... Where Grace fills that space... His nearness is palitable... And when all you did or did not do during the Lenten season stops suddenly...it does feel abrupt ... Leaving such a focused time can leave me a bit dizzy... So like you...I went on a walk...I let the breeze wash over me...the blooming flowers speak life to me...and sitting still under the blue sky with its cotton ball clouds... How small I felt...how Very Big God felt... And the world began to spin less and less!!!!
ReplyDeleteOH good. This year I was traveling a lot through Lent, so was focused on other aspects of Living in Christ … but even with a 3 day attentiveness, ohhh, the emptiness. . … Now we fit what we know, have lived through, into the ordinary life we mostly live. Thanks for writing, Ro!
DeleteThis: "Today I see how He is hung upon me like a scarf, like moss, like the green growing force that He is, He who will never stop clinging to me and to you." Beautiful! I am learning to find the fullness of life in Him, especially in the unexpected, the grief, the deaths of things other than bodies. With our God, tombs become birthing rooms for new and abundant life. Thank you for sharing your words, your photos, your heart.
ReplyDeleteYou're so welcome, Heather. I love that, "With our God, tombs become birthing rooms for new and abundant life." Thank YOU!
DeleteBeautiful, Leslie. Thank you for each word, each picture.
ReplyDeleteDiana, thank you for reading and bearing witness with me . ..
DeleteThanks for this. Quite nice. So many "special days" seem to have let down on the other side of them. Their own version of "The day after". Yet walks in nature always seem to fill a void. somehow they "recalibrate" my soul.
ReplyDelete"recalibrate"---yes. And it helps get our eyes off ourselves into what God is doing in His world, even His creation. Thank you for being here with me.
DeleteI don't check you blog every day, but tonight I did and it blessed me. Oh the day after and today have been just as you described. The real hobbled life has closed in again like a prison. It seems Satan just picks, picks, picks with little and not so little problems until I forget how close Jesus is. Yes, how he clings and drapes and loves me--how he has given me life and wants me to live it abundantly. Thank you for the reminder.
ReplyDeleteJoy---you're so welcome. So thankful that the ways He speaks to me serve others as well . … (And no apologies needed for not checking here every day. I post once or twice a week. No one needs to hear from me every day!!) Thanks for checking in this week. Blessed to have you here.
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