A 40 foot humpback whale washed ashore near the end of the road last fall, killed by orcas. I don’t know how many bears claimed the carcass at first, but now, a mother and cub, smelling opportunity, have ambled over and claimed what's left as their own.
They're camping out on the carcass, hosts of a no-guests and “You’re-not-welcome” feast-fest.
Other bears were not welcome, nor eagles, foxes, crows or any other sort of carrion-eater. (The mother, in fact, dispatched with a eagle with a single swipe of its paw. See photo above)) But respectful people and their cameras were tolerated.
It was a great relief to see these bears, especially after the killing of another kind of Kodiak bear this last week. A bear who refused to leave a schoolyard and neighborhood dumpster. (How many other schools go into lock-down for bears refusing to “recess” for recess?) How reassuring to watch the right kind of bear----the wild kind. The kind like the other 3500+ on this island who eat wild things, living or dead, not our rotting packaging and waste. Who live as they should, not as they can.
And more than relief, what astonishing connection we feel with these creatures and their recognizable parental displays of love, annoyance, boredom and affection.
I was reminded, too, of another reason I live here. Why I put up with lousy weather, isolation, and too much cloud, dark and rain. For this: To witness untamed beings in all their wildness.
I was excited, then, to make the trip two days ago out to the end of the road--literally---with my camera in hand. But this one road out of town doesn’t ride well when you’re tired. After a switchback-sickening hour plus drive, we arrived. I lit from my car to peer over the bank. I saw---------
---------a beach and a skeleton startlingly empty of bears.
Another car sat on the bank, waiting. I discovered the news: the whale is mostly consumed and mother-and-cub are foraging elsewhere. I missed them by just two days.
This was not what I planned. Not for the day. Not for this post. So here is the truth: the photos above were taken by my camera, but not by me. By my much-luckier niece, Rachelle Fields, who ventured out two days before me, my camera in her capable hands.
French poet Charles Peguy has written“We must always tell what we see. Above all, and this is more difficult, we must always see what we see.”
So I am telling what I saw: an empty beach. Scavenged bones. The tracks of creatures who were gone. And I saw more besides. I saw myself getting home at 7:30 pm with a long to-do-before-bed list that couldn’t be put off. I saw an evening of more than usual fatigue. An evening of haranguing my sons to get their homework and piano done. None of us had three hours to waste that day.
As it turned out, I wasn’t wrong about any of that. Except the evening went even worse than I envisioned it. But something else happened as well. Along the way home, I took out my camera, a large camera whose weight and whose lens remind me what I’m supposed to be doing. I left my notepad on my lap and asked Duncan, who was driving, to stop every few minutes, every bend of the road for another image.
Back home, today,I re-read Annie Dillard’s Pilgrim at Tinker Creek to remember again what I’m supposed to be doing in this life.
"The world is wilder . . . more dangerous and bitter, more extravagant and bright. We are making hay when we should be making whoopee; we are raising tomatoes when we should be raising Cain, or Lazarus.
Go up into the gaps. If you can find them; they shift and vanish too. Stalk the gaps. . . . This is how you spend this afternoon, and tomorrow morning, and tomorrow afternoon. Spend the afternoon. You can’t take it with you.”
We did go into the gaps. We stalked bears. And while waiting hopefully for the bears to return, we climbed gravel hills, toured clear-cut devastation, marveled at beaches we hadn’t seen before.
Somehow, I just stumbled upon your blog and have been blessed tremendously by your gift with words and photographic composition. What a wonderful artist you are! As a fellow soul-sister, I too find intimacy with God in His creation on our Wisconsin horse farm. (I blog here at truelifewithgod.com.) So glad to have found you! Looking forward to following your journey!
ReplyDeleteHeather---welcome!! I'm so happy you've joined us! I'm not a daily blogger---I just don't think anyone needs to hear from me every day. I just write weekly---but it is my prayer that the words and images will encourage us all along the way. I'll check out yours as well. I hope we can encourage one another onward---and Godward!! Gratefully, Leslie
DeleteI loved your comments about the bears that you didn't see, but so glad that your niece did and took wonderful pictures. I also like your picture of the stacked woodpile. I, too, have taken a picture similar to that, just because I like the design the logs make. I'm reading your book "Surviving the Island of Grace" and am enjoying the vicarious experience.
ReplyDeleteAhhhh Birdie!! Apologies for "Surviving." It may be a bit intense . .. but so was life for all those years. I hope you find the grace in it as well. And when you're done, you'll know far more about me than I know about you---not fair!! (But thanks for reading---and writing, always) Leslie
DeleteThank you for sharing this, Leslie, and for the reminder to slow down and soak in the Glory that is all around us -- even in the bean fields of my home turf in northern Indiana! I look forward to living vicariously in the wilds of Alaska through your blog. Ingrid
ReplyDeleteIngrid--surely there is beauty to stalk in your bean fields! Sometimes it is so hard to see what's around us. Even here, I see these mountains every day . . . But this is what we're after---to keep seeing. (Even seeing what isn't there). Thanks for "seeing" with me!
DeleteSlowing down--so hard to do. Thanks to you and your niece for the photos and thanks for the words that give me something to think on.
ReplyDeleteCheryl Russell
Very welcome, cheryl! This was one of those times when words help lead me to a better truth than I was feeling . .. Still stalking the gaps, Leslie
DeleteThank you for having the courage to write what you saw, not what you wished you saw. And for sharing the beauty that surprised you. There is so much in that.
ReplyDeleteI have been chewing on Psalm 33 for a few days, especially "For the word of the Lord holds true, and we can trust everything he does. {Everything. He. Does.} He loves whatever is just and good; the unfailing love of the Lord fills the earth."
I find myself wrestling to make peace with God's gifts--and God Himself--when they aren't what I'm asking for. Trust is such a wild, unweildy thing, a place of freedom and beauty. What a timely reminder.
Amy---thanks so much for these words from Ps. 33. Wow. (Can we really trust everything He does?? We must!) My family is in a time of bursting gifts---and along with it comes the weight of carrying and using them. It is never simple. But whether God entrusts us with one bag of gold (just re-reading the parable of the talents) or with three---and whether we want it or not---there it is. What will we do with what's been given? I pray you peace today what what's been delivered to your house and door . ... Leslie
DeleteLeslie- So grateful I found your blog! Oh how your words and photos bless. And these...“We must always tell what we see. Above all, and this is more difficult, we must always see what we see.” Asking for grace to do just that! Blessings to you!
ReplyDeleteThank you Lyn! I'm so glad you found me here! I hope we can encourage one another onward--and Godward!
DeleteThank you! It is good that there are places (and sad that there are so few) where bears can still be bears as they are meant to be.
ReplyDeleteCharlene--yes indeed, bears pretty much have the run of this island. It's a treat most of the time to share it with them (but bad things happen too.) I'll write about that some other time. Thanks for reading!
DeleteLately the truth that there is something precious in the ordinary, if we only have eyes to see, has been whispered to my heart over and over. More often than not my days don't go according to my plan. I am trying to learn to hold my plans with open hands and release them to receive what the Father has for me. You've captured that so beautifully Leslie. What treasure you would have missed if you hadn't take the time to see.
ReplyDeleteLinda---yes . .. . We are such goal-setting creatures. Or I am anyway, to the extreme sometimes. And sometimes our plans are not His---and if we can just recover soon enough to still pay attention . .. Working on that with you, Leslie
DeleteHello Leslie, I have had you on my blog list for a awhile, and I am just now leaving a comment. Your writing is so moving, I seem to lose my words. But I have finally realized I was not losing my words, but rather being challenged. I know deep down inside...
ReplyDeleteMay my Lord give me the creative wisdom I pray for!
My contrast is striking, it is bare and barren all around us. Yet, in the distance I see the majestic mountains, the great Rockies. Thanks for the amazing words and the pictures they have created.
Blessings, Roxy
Hi Roxy!! thank you so very much for being here with us. Keep asking for that creative wisdom, keep reading and praying with your eyes open---and it will come. Even in the barren landscapes, there is something there. You will find it. Blessings, Leslie
Delete"Stalking the gaps" ... I love that. I'd never heard the expression before. Beautiful post and photographs. The photo your niece took of the the mother bear looking like she's about to give her cub a swat on the bottom gave me a good mama bear belly laugh!
ReplyDeleteTarissa---isn't that photo hilarious?? I see myself there exactly!! (Her fur looks better than mine, though). Thanks so much for reading! I love sharing with you! Leslie
DeleteYou are to be commended for what you were able to see and capture in spite of what were your expectations. Too often, too late, I realize that I was blind to opportunities that presented themselves as the consequence of what I initially took to be disappointments. To be in the moment as it is given and to >see< and receive what is before us, I believe requires a kind of maturity that I am still trying to learn.
ReplyDeleteBob---I'm still learning, like you. But thanks for coming along on this one. We'll keep on getting opportunities both to see, and to see through disappointments. I hope I'm ready next time--but even if I miss it, there will yet be more chances . .. Blessings, friend, Leslie
ReplyDelete